Visit Wales.com

So come one

come all

to the linguistic

free for all

aka

Visit Wales.com

It's not your fault

no

nothing ever is

you're just a

no mark

Your boat is moored at Abersoch

the Dunroamin? or Lady Lee?

You stand on the balcony

of the yacht club and say

'Something Must be Done'

About this language that they insist on speaking.

We welcome anyone,

even the leader of the B.N.P

however if I met him

I'd tie him to a tree

I'd put a pointy hat on his head

and a box of Special K in his hand

and then I'd light the bonfire with my

fiery wand.

It's all right to be racist if you're English

But if you're Welsh

and losing your language

your soul

eich 'enaid'

the same rules do no apply to you.

After all the simmering resentment

is just

role reversed contentment

Get used to it Taffy

cos

Anne Robinson, Jeremy Clarkson and Katie Hopkins

have got their names down

for cottages

on the Lleyn. 

Time to say Goodbye

2 weeks ago now

I was sat outside Costa Coffee

in my shades observing

and being observed on

St John's Square, Liverpool

A man with a pram had wheeled his violin and speakers

to a spot in the middle of the square.

He was warming up quite nicely

and so was I.

The song that he was playing quite

ironically was

"Time to say Goodbye"

because no sooner had he started

than a man came around from behind the Jewellers with

his walkie talkie

and started pointing and remonstrating

and shaking his head.

He shrugs his shoulders and 'security' is now using sign language

A finger to the lips won't hush this Musician.

He continues to say goodbye,

the notes cutting through the morning fugue. 

Where man fails

woman prevails.

Lady Manageress

tells

the musician in no uncertain terms to leave.

Haunting music cannot be good for business.

He packs up and puts his babies back in the pram

and I get to wondering whether she has any children.

It was obviously time for him to say Goodbye 

and I wish that the old trout had stayed in her shop,

that sold shiny rocks.

Gentrification

continues

apace.



Genius Loci

 

I think I have discovered a Hobby! Psycho-Geography, something that I have been doing for most of my adult life without realising what it was! Basically, walking everywhere usually cities, picking up the vibes and energies, checking out the buildings. I have been very fortunate since September last, to be able to do this with both Manchester and Liverpool. I have walked Cardiff to death! I walked Amsterdam to death in 2005 before I was bundled off the streets unceremoniously. I see similarities between Cardiff, Amsterdam and Liverpool and that is Water! These are cities where water plays an important role, more so in Amsterdam and Liverpool. I am fascinated by Docklands and was fortunate or unfortunate to walk most of Rotterdam Docks in 2005 as well. There is something of the occult about Psycho-Geography in that it involves the spirit of a place, what the Romans would call, the Genius Loci http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Genius_loci  Occasionally my walking gets so extreme that my antennae become finely tuned and I become very sensitive to noise and unfortunately noise and traffic are big parts of city life. I see traffic as a nuisance because I want to cross the road and I still don't understand why somebody in a tin room with wheels takes precedence over someone on two legs.
Probably because they pay more tax to the Government but the experience of Psycho-Geography for me is spoilt by traffic so Parks and Green Spaces become a haven and destination. Another potential problem is that I have a large personal space. I don't feel comfortable when people get physically close. I have a need to keep a distance and that in itself can be a challenge in a city. I can be quite the twitchy, fussy flaneur about town.  Water is like the heart of a city, it pumps it round the system and I have felt that cities with water have a better feel than cities without. It's almost like the water diffuses the pollution. London perhaps would be an exception. London is very popular with Psychogeographers. I have walked much of London and the places that have a real, authentic vibe and energy are places like Kilburn, Deptford & Brick Lane. Places that jangle with me are Kensington & Park Lane. Artificial Wealth. Liverpool 1 has become like this. If I was a female psycho-geographer perhaps shops and retail would provide their own interest value but it is Antique Shops, Bric a Brac, Second Hand and Bookshops that hold my interest. I yearn for authenticity, the real thing and in our dumbed down society and culture this is becoming a rarer thing. I am detecting a dark Victorian Energy in parts of Manchester. Some of the Buildings are so tall and oppressive that finding a green space is a priority and I don't think that Piccadilly Gardens qualifies. Somewhere that I have walked up and down quite a lot is Oxford Road Manchester and this is incredibly busy and I remarked to a Geologist that I felt very frazzled after walking down there and he said that it could be to do with the number of Telephone Masts down there. There are so many convenient supermarkets and coffee outlets for students that you are literally spoilt for choice. It could be the energy of youth, it could be that I am getting too old to be walking in loud, busy places. I have to have sanctuaries in cities where I can escape and these are the Parks, Museums and Libraries. I have spent much of my life in these places because I cannot literally deal with the Psychic Energy of cities for too long. On the other hand, country life would not be stimulating enough for me at this stage. If after reading this any fellow Psycho-Geographers have suggestions for places and cities that are good to explore, please do let me know in the comments section below. Thank You!  

Spirit 1904

Ysbryd 1904

Chester, where this train terminates!

Chester



where this train terminates.

Even termites terminate at Chester

There is a graveyard behind Booker

on the way in.

There will be no cash and carry going on there.

They will all have turned to worms.

No need for digestive practices.

No need for the Middle Man.

Just stick it down the pan, Stan!

Yes, everything terminates

at Chester

The Romans, The Welsh

and Pissheads

Let's get the fast train out of here.

Ah! no! right! I see!

From Arriva to Mersey Rail

we're going from slow to slower.

It stops everywhere,

a clump of sand,

a matchbox,

an empty cider bottle

Yes, the train stops there too.

No wonder everything terminates

at Chester.

 

A semiotic reading would indicate that this was written by a fan of Wrexham F.C  

Holiday Inn Hoodlum

 

 

I am the Holiday Inn Hoodlum

Not for me the Y.H.A

I kick off at the slightest mention

of middle class D.N.A

I wreak havoc amongst the pot plants

I prepare my little rants

I moon in the foyer

and flash my Superman pants.

I watch the sour faced couples

making hate across the floor

and wince, as they glide out smiling,

through the plate glass door.

Hotels are a rip-off

Hotels they are a con.

They will charge you a very nice price

for being artificially nice. 

You can stay on our crisp white linen

You can get very pissed in our bar,

We'll even let you park, your shiny, shitty car.

But don't ask us for any extras

don't moan and please don't fight

Cos you think your staying longer

but you're here for just one night.