All I want for Christmas is 1647
Noddy Holder screaming through the letterbox
Seasonal Records on repeat shall be banned
We’re going to have a Covid Christmas
The virus with an apple in its mouth on a silver platter
Nain entertains Drakeford in Santa suit
Mamgu knows that he’s a bugger for his cheese.
Vaughan Gething on mute in zoom meeting.
Andrew 'Right Twat' Davies plays with his toys
Boris & Carrie Dolls.
Will it be Colleen Rooney or Rebekah Vardy
with the Christ Mass No 1?
“We want a normal christmas” cry the retailers.
Get that Celebrity out of here, this is a haunted castle.
Once I had a lockdown love.
Sod 2020 Mr Scrooge
I want Oliver Cromwell and his Puritan Pie round my table.
The Lord Protector’s wishes are stuff of fable.
Oh little town of Bethlehem
Jesus of Nazareth was not born so that we
may take the pisseth out of Christmas and get pissed.
The Queen will be muted and the Parliament blocked.
Into the USB port the Roundheads have docked
The New Model Army look upon
Black Friday shoppers as if they were barmy.
No dancing round the Maypole for you Mr Claypole.
Carol Singers will be run through by my pike and staff
I’m off to London Zoo to free the giraffe 🦒
Until ALL have homes and families and there are no lonely
All I want for Christmas is 1647.