My First, My Last, My Everything

"Industrial units replace farms. FRUIT DISTRIBUTION CENTRE: a white flag pole garlanded with barbed wire. A faded Union Jack. We're closing on territory where Englishness is a threat, faces painted with red crosses. The Darent is nudged aside by the thrust of the M25 -as it races towards the Thames. Wat Tyler, famously revolting peasant and local hero, lends his name to profoundly conservative pubs. Top Man: the most popular Dartford heritage token. Before the advent of Mick Jagger."   Iain Sinclair: London Orbital (Salt to Source page 448)

I propose in this blog post to replace God Save the Queen with Barry White's My First, My Last, My Everything. You might deduce from my social commentary of the 14/4/2022 that I am a traitor to the British cause in my generic Eastern European accent but I hope to suggest something here that might ameliorate your bruised feelings. When I said 'This country is an absolute shithole" I was of course referring to the Conservative Government, the Home Office and their paymasters the British Monarchy. 

God save our gracious Queen,
Long live our noble Queen,
God save the Queen:
Send her victorious,
Happy and glorious,
Long to reign over us:
God save the Queen.


O Lord our God arise,
Scatter her enemies,
And make them fall:
Confound their politics,
Frustrate their knavish tricks,
On Thee our hopes we fix:
God save us all.


Thy choicest gifts in store,
On her be pleased to pour;
Long may she reign:
May she defend our laws,
And ever give us cause
To sing with heart and voice
God save the Queen.
On Thee our hopes we fix:
God save us all.

In the three verses of God Save the Queen there isn't a single mention of the landmass of ancient Britain. This is an anthem that is encouraging us to protect the Head of State so how can it be a National Anthem?  Written in 1825 they foresaw the Policing Bill with these lines from the second verse 

Scatter her enemies, 

And make them fall:

Confound their politics,

Frustrate their knavish tricks,

It doesn't state where those enemies are?! Coming across the channel in a dinghy perhaps.

Can you imagine Wembley rocking to the soulful sounds of Barry White, a black man with a white name. Ticks all the boxes right? You need a song to unite a people not a dirge to make them feel more oppressed than they already are. After all they are singing to protect the mother of a nonce and if there is something that the Working Class Brit doesn't like, it is a nonce.

By replacing the de facto anthem of the United Kingdom you will essentially be ushering the advent of a British Republic where the House of Windsor will have exited bloodlessly stage left and Great Britain will henceforth be referred to as its ancient name of 'Britain'. There will be no United Kingdom anymore because there will be no more Kings and Queens. Only Barry White singing to the landmass "You're my first, my last, my everything."

Welsh and Scottish Nationalists can then decide whether they wish to go it alone but even they in their passion know that as they clutch their Ivy and Mountain Heather that there is no chance of Independence from an unaccountable, un-elected, Great British Monarchy.

Take it away Barry