Putting the Fin back into Politics

Plaid Siarcod Cymru

The Shark Party of Wales

Putting the Fin back into Politics

The next National Assembly for Wales election is due to be held on Thursday 6th May 2021. If I live that long, this old shark will be 55 years of age. Just the right dotage to be sat in the Senedd in my homemade Shark Outfit.

Adam Price, the Assembly member for Carmarthen East and Dinefwr once described me as 'all mouth and trousers'. He might very well be right, as I have chosen the easy route of satirist and blogger, not to make a living, as opposed to the £65,344 a year that he and his ilk make sat in the Cardiff Sea Aquarium also known as the Welsh Assembly or Senedd to you nuisance Welsh Speakers. What fucks this particular shark off is that there are 6 members of that Fringe Satirical Party UKIP sitting in the Goldfish Bowl each taking home that wad whilst two members namely Dafydd Elis-Thomas and Nathan Gill although elected under the banner of their party, are now sitting under the Independent banner, a move now euphemistically referred to as 'doing a Carswell'. Now this 55 year old Shark would like to stand in 2021 under the banner of 'The Shark Party of Wales' or 'Plaid Siarcod Cymru' to you nuisance Welsh Speakers. My aim is to rid the Peoples' Socialist Republic of Wales of all British Nationalists. They can go screaming or they can go quietly, I don't care as long as they go. I've had a look at the Electoral Commission's guidelines for setting up a political party and Adam Price might well be right, I don't know whether I can be arsed to go to all the financial outlay and administrative trouble of setting up a party but my aim would be to stand candidates against all UKIP Candidates + Gill & Thomas and give them a bloody nose.

 Please see below for our (my) first outline manifesto.   

  

PLAID SIARCOD CYMRUTHE SHARK PARTY OF WALES

A MANIFESTO

⦁ This Party believes in Independence for Wales. Independence from the rest of the United Kingdom.

⦁ This Party believes that there is no place in a Liberal Democracy for British Nationalists.

⦁ This Party believes in a fully Bi-Lingual Wales with Cymraeg First on all documents and in all public discourse. The indigenous language of Wales must take precedence over the language of the Oppressors. Welsh will be compulsory for all residents of Wales. After five years, if the individual does not meet acceptable standards, they are escorted to the Severn Bridge and to the end of the A55.

⦁ This Party believes in the decriminalization of Cannabis.

⦁ This Party does not believe in the methods employed by the punitive justice system of the United Kingdom. Prison is a destination of last resort and will only be used for serious offences. No offences involving theft, fraud, money laundering will be punished by Prison.

⦁ This Party believes that Alcohol is an evil and a poison and will introduce Prohibition to Wales.

⦁ This Party believes that Public fornication should be encouraged. Nakedness will be the norm and the old missionary position with the lights off will be discouraged. 

⦁ This Party believes that there is no such thing as 'Mental Health'. You've all got it, so F Off with your 1 in 5 statistics.