Crowds

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_personality_disorder

 

 

 

 

Borderline Personality Disorder, Bi-polar Disorder, Avoidant Personality Disorder. What I have is on a Spectrum! I know one thing, I am not NORMAL. I don't want anybody to get the misguided impression that I am like them. I am according to friends 'A Paradox'. I have the skills and talents but my choice is to withdraw from society. I went out yesterday to try and address my avoidant personality disorder but all I was faced with was crowds. Ok what was I expecting, it was a Saturday! On the Train Platform people were nudging closer to the doors to get one of the seats without a reservation ticket, of which there were only three left. Twice the number of people for the carriages provided!

The bus then was packed, transferring from one bus to another, that was packed as well.

When I am in the presence of many others I adopt the tactic of no eye contact, closing my eyes, hoping that they will all dissapear. It's very unfair and judgemental of me because I am a nuisance and a crowd to other people but that is because of our ego! Where would we be without crowds? Capitalism relies on crowds. Supermarkets rely on crowds! They couldn't operate and wouldn't be profitable if there were less of us or could they? It's the Footfall! Bums on Seats for Theatres, Cinemas and Universities especially if those bums are foreign. More money then!
I took my own food yesterday so I wasn't contributing to the local economy apart from buying a Coffee which always feels like you have ripped the heart out of the cow, the farmer and the coffee grower at the same time.

 

There must  be some kind of pay off to this behaviour or I would not have continued with it for so long. It is about Control. Like this I can control my behaviour, my feelings. I don't have to be assaulted and buffeted by images and sounds that emotionally distress me. I wonder if I need to be de-sensitised so that I can be like everyone else. A drone that appears happy amongst others.  

 

 



 



 



 



Isle of Avalon

Damp, drab concrete, like Amsterdam.

Full Moon over Glastonbury but I'm not high on any substance

other than an over priced Latte.

Disappointing it was.

I had been many years before.

This was perhaps my third visit.

The last time, I left a friend in a pub eating pickled eggs.

I haven't seen him since.

Wounded Seekers in Faerie Outfits and Zombie Masks

artificially happy.

It's a heavy burden to put on any town.

No crystals, incense or deep spiritual books did I buy

but a box of tissues in the Co-Op to clean up the mess

from a knockdown Florida Salad that had leaked in my rucksack.

Spirituality!

Even though I don't want to believe it

I'm starting to think it's just

Escapism!





Their families have been informed.

Their families have been informed!

 

 

 

Well I should bloody well hope so too!

Having been killed in such a bloody fashion!

Bloody Hell, it surely is.

It’s OK for us, the Sheep,

Like Turkeys waiting for Christmas

Lined up like Ducks in a shooting gallery!

We just get on with our inane existences

As they…

They who shall not grow old

Go on Patrol

In the Graveyard of Empires.

This will be the Third Anglo Afghan War!

We lost the other two!

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and hoping for a different result.

But what do they care?

Those dumb donkeys!

A Lion lies bleeding.

Fight the Rich and not their Wars

Their Families have been informed.

On the Futility of War and the Sickness of Light Entertainment.

 

 

On the futility of war and the sickness of light entertainment!

An adaptation of

The "Ode of Remembrance" is an ode taken from Laurence Binyon's poem "For the Fallen", which was first published in The Times in September 1914.

 

They went with songs to the battle, they were young.

Oh turn the telly on! It will be on soon!

Straight of limb, true of eyes, steady and aglow.

Who will be voted off tonight!

They were staunch to the end against odds uncounted,

The Opium of the Masses

They fell with their faces to the foe.

Stop making me feel guilty! It's not my fault! 

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:

Look give me a break,

Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn. 

Sssh! Simon Cowell is talking!

At the going down of the sun and in the morning,

We will remember them.

Until X Factor and Strictly Come Dancing are on.....

 and then we’ll forget you for a bit!



Happy Anniversary to Me!

 

I couldn't let today go by without wishing 'Shark Fishing in Wales' Happy Anniversary! Despite being ignored by the Wales Blog Awards, despite getting only an average of 18 views per post I am still here or 'still by ere' as they say in Williamstown, Rhondda. It was way back on January 19th that the foetus became blog.
I was over in the Wellfield/Albany Road of Kairdiff today and trawled the Charity Shops for books. I went into five, the books' sections have become very small, testament perhaps to less people reading, but I finally found a good selection in the Kidney Society Shop which is two doors up from a 'Spiritual Shop' called Halcyon Daze. I mention this because you don't get many of these per square mile in this part of the country. I don't know abouts where you live? Glastonbury it ain't. I think the term used to describe them is a Mind, Body, Spirit shop  but the vibe I get from this one is lots of crystals and incense and posters advertising spiritual stuff.
Unbeknownst to me on my bike, the other side of the City, a white van driver was busy reversing into pedestrians.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-20014598

Controversial I know, but having seen the eye witnesses on the BBC News website, I would say that he'd targetted the wrong people (Ouch!) But when you are a misanthrope you cannot but help entertain these thoughts and you have to admit that these events are becoming more common. Only earlier in the year, a Kairdiff Taxi Driver had mounted the kerb and ran down railway workers in orange overalls!

http://sharkfishinginwales.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/taxi-driver-arrested-as-seven-men-are.html

People are losing their minds and I feel that I am qualified to talk about this because I lost my mind in 2005, I lost it so badly that I was arrested and thrown into prison. After 4 months on remand I was declared 'Not Guilty due to Insanity'. Luckily this was in the Netherlands and not in UK PLC. I won't reveal my crime here as my other blog has been syndicated to Chipmunka Publishing and I am hoping that it will be published in an ebook and paperback.(but don't hold your breath) When I hear that somebody has lost their mind, I experience a certain 'frisson', the hairs on the back of my neck stand up! I wonder about the person and I wonder about the train of events that occurred to the person to lead them to their course of action. So maybe I wasn't so far off in my prophetic Blog Post of the 31st January.

http://sharkfishinginwales.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/lay-line.html

I am actually amazed that more people don't become insane and lose it. It is quite literally a Human Zoo out there! What are we doing to each other? If we know that we are going to die, why do we make life so difficult for eachother?  
There is something in the air and in the water! The Energy has changed!
There will be more collective Insanity until something happens. That something will probably be on a global basis.

 Anyway on a purely selfish basis

 'Happy Anniversary to Me'.

What is your Purpose?

Go to your sacred place where you feel connection to deity.

Ask your Higher Power what your purpose, your duty, your job, your goal in life should be.

Often this is part of a Vision Quest. There are many kinds of Vision Quests. Some are a rite of passage taken for a few days, a week, or even a month. Men and women both may do this and it is always done alone with a teacher checking up on the individual participating to make sure they are allright. Usually a Vision Quest is taken for a reason to accomplish something or learn something. Some Shamen use Sweat Lodges, listen to drumming, bells jingling, rattling, singing, chanting, meditation, etc to get into an altered state to communicate with Spirit. Some go to high places, a special well, a special rock formation or a place of high energy or a personal known sacred place.



The ancestors or deity will fill your mind with information you need to know.



Stand tall with your arms raised to the sky and ask out loud what you need to know. Be still, listen to the wind, honor all the elements, all living things, your ancestors, your deity, and then your purpose, your goal, and your duty will begin to grow from that point on. (H.J.Carol Thompson, aka Stormsdottir)

 Lluniau/Pictures of Cadair Idris

Sylwadau cwmni ynni E.On - ein hymateb

Sylwadau cwmni ynni E.On - ein hymateb