Who put the Great in Great Yarmouth?

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Sunday, 10 September 2023

Hooray for All Gone Hollywood

 


https://twitter.com/chipsforaquid

https://twitter.com/iconic_ironic_


Out of the Frying Pan 

Into the Flicks

I was very fortunate last season to attend two away games during the story of Wrexham AFC's return to the Football League 2022/2023 and here's the proof.  


13th August 2022
Yeovil Town 1-1 Wrexham
Mullin '6


9th November 2022
Scunthorpe 1-3 Wrexham
Palmer 21', Hayden 33', Mullin 70'

I say fortunate because from what I've seen of this season's campaign in League 2 you would be very lucky to bag a seat home or away. That is what the sprinkly stardust of tinseltown does for you and one who has turned his love and encyclopaedic knowledge of cinema and its history into a hobby that glows in neon on Saturdays (and Tuesday nights if there is a midweek game) is Andy from twitter account "All Gone Hollywood" I started noticing his work very early on and likes became regular retweets on my behalf. I was taken by his ingenuity, his obvious love and appreciation of cinema and its history and his application in turning what he had witnessed at Stok Cae Ras into cinema posters. It was the speed with which they went up on twitter that amazed me. They were up the same evening within a couple of hours. He would also treat us to some prematch artwork on occasion to get the juices flowing.

A picture paints a thousand words and receiving 'Out of the Frying Pan and into the Flicks' into my grubby hands ensured that I hired a latex glove to turn the pages in homage to its creators. Andy at "All Gone Hollywood" teamed up with "Chips For a Quid"   to create a Magnum Opus, a Coffee Table book that any Wrexham FC supporter young or old would be very fortunate to get their hands on because not surprisingly it is now a limited edition collector's item. I can only shudder at what the amount of production costs came to because this is a quality edition, 60 pages of glossy paper with words and pictures by two who were obviously around Wrexham FC when our new chairpersons were young uns themselves. This work would especially appeal to a younger demographic. I imagined a picture of me as a teenager reading this with a torch under the bed covers. It is the work of enthusiasts for enthusiasts. 

My sage words of advice for anybody reading this is if you love Wrexham AFC, if you are passionate about films and cinema. If you appreciate, down to earth, no frills writing then monitor the social media accounts of "Chips for a Quid"  and "All Gone Hollywood"  throughout the season and especially towards the end because a little bird has told me that there will be another commemoration annual of Wrexham's inaugural season in League 2.
The way Wrexham are playing at the moment and with the signings that Parky has made this one could again become a much sought after collector's item.

On the back of the publication reads the following

Thank you for supporting this not-for-profit project. 10% of all
proceeds donated to Nightingale House Hospice, Wrexham 

Saturday, 19 August 2023

Bonnie Prince Harry


 
They've recreated the facial features of Bonnie Prince Charlie and doesn't he look a dead ringer for Bonnie Prince Harry if you close your eyes and discount the beard. That same, distant expression. Instead of representing the House of Stuart, Harry is representing the House of Spare.

Now as an Anti-Monarchist (with a picture of Queen Elizabeth II at home on the wall because she sent it in a birthday card to my father on his 100th Birthday), you might think it strange that I am writing about Prince Harry, the true heir apparent to the English throne. Prince Harry is in exile as was Charles Edward Louis John Sylvester Maria Casimir Stuart. Both are young pretenders to the English throne. Bonnie Prince Charlie should have become Charles III and not Prince Harry's father.

As disinterested as you probably are, the question I have for you is this.

Should Prince Harry and his wife Megan arrive by boat on the West Coast of Scotland would you show your colours for the 'not so young' Chevalier or would you be standing in the ranks of Prince William of Wales' army under Major General Jeremy Clarkson?

We know that at every General Election we are required to vote for the lesser of the two evils, Conservative or Labour. We know that as subjects of the 'British Realm' we have to put up and shut up with their royal pish at our collective expense. Well I am asking you, whether you are Monarchist or Republican, if the choice was between Prince William and Prince Harry, which one would you choose for your King?

The likelihood is that Harry would be a much more 'down with the people' kind of monarch whereas we know that William has procreated like a Prince on a promise and that promise being to carry on with the status quo of unelected monarchy for generations to come.   

As Republican as I am I just do not see the Windsors (nee Saxe-Coburg unt Gothas) handing over the keys to their many palaces without a fight. Would you lay down your life for a British Republic? Thought not. Ok! Are you as prepared to kick up as much of a stink about our unelected Monarchy as you are about the 20mph zones and ULEZ? No? thought not. You mean you would rather kick a Just Stop Oil protestor in the bollocks than you would stopping 'The Firm' creaming off more funds into the Royal coffers? Yes, I thought this is who I was dealing with.

In that case there's no hope for any of us. Not even for those in late at night transatlantic telephone calls urging 'The House of Spare' to return to claim a right to a commoner's throne, through an interracial marriage, to honour his dear old mum, Our Diana. No we will just have to give up without a fight and accept our fate and buy a copy of the Big Issue from the new seller on the block.


 

Monday, 14 August 2023

You can call me the Red under your bed!

 


You can call me the Red under your Bed

A frisson of hope coursed through my veins today

when I heard that Russia had entered our airspace.

I had a premonition in Amsterdam about the Soviet Union and Iran

I sensed that they would be the new world order

and that we would be toast

We being the West who love to drop bombs on innocents

and wage war by proxy

the proper coward’s way.

The Ruling Elite in Britain

could do with a Bolshevik Revolution

to give them a ‘braw’

which is shock in Welsh

but we await with a sense of awe.

Shock and Awe.

Will Putin march his men down to the Cenotaph?

Will he occupy Buckingham Palace and put an oligarch in charge?

Will he liberate all the migrants from that shitty old barge?

Will he send Suella to Rwanda and send Rishi off in a small boat?

Or will he continue to bomb Ukraine the silly old goat?

He needs to invade Britain and give us a kick up the arse

We’ve become bitter and hostile since Brexit

We need a Communist light exit

You can call me the Red under your bed.

Monday, 7 August 2023

Pest Poet Patrol

 



I'm in the library reading the poems of others

and what strikes me is how lonely they appear!

Children need to scream in the summer holidays in

supermarkets and in bookshops and on the buses.

And like them I believe that poems should shout 

and not lie limply upon a page like a cut flower past its sell by date.


I'm working out how best to deal with rats.

They are in my loft 🐀

I hear them scurrying up and down the wall outside.

We live in parallel universes, the rats and the poet

and even though I do not earn from this most bizarre of pasttimes

I still eat.


I don't want to poison them because I can hear their babies squeal

They are probably thinking "that human's a nuisance.

trying to write poetry that is beneath us (literally)

We should get on to pest control"

Pest Poet Control

    Pest Poet Patrol   

Saturday, 29 July 2023

Guest Blog Post: Author Ekaterina Netchitailova

 


So Ekaterina Netchitailova welcome to Shark Fishing in Wales as Guest Author and thank you for agreeing to answer my questions.

Can I check is it Netchitailova or Petrovna?

This is a very good question, and the answer is quite long, reflecting my family name, which is Netchitailova. It means 'unreadable' in Russian, which is a pity as one of my greatest passions in life is writing! Petrovna is a patronym. We all have it, back in Russia. It reflects the name of your father. My dad's first name is Petr, and therefore, I am Petrovna. If I lived in Russia, I would be called Ekaterina Petrovna by people who don't know me well, or in official settings. Here, everyone calls me just Ekaterina, but you can also call me Katia. It's another thing in Russia, - the first names have their own variations. Svetlana becomes Sveta, Aleksandra is Sasha, Daria is Dasha, and Ekaterina is Katia.

I understand that it's all a bit confusing, but that's what different cultures and traditions are for - to know something interesting. I think that knowledge of different cultures and national habits enriches our lives! 

When did you first begin writing and in what language?

I started to write at the age of fourteen, and in Russian. I lived in Moscow then and reading was my greatest pleasure in life. I tried to write, and even won a third place at one of the writing competitions at my school, but didn't pursue this hobby until the age of twenty-seven, right after my experience with a psychosis. Writing helped me to recover and make sense of what was happening to me on a spiritual level. Since then I can't stop writing. It became a passion. I also write in English, which might appear as weird, but I love the English language and often think in English. 

Who were your main writing influences?

My main writing influence is Master and Margarita by Bulgakov.  The book tells two parallel stories. In one story Bulgakov tells about the devil visiting the Soviet Union, and in his second story, he tells the reader about Jesus. I read the book for the first time when I was twelve, which is a bit early for such a profound and deep novel, but I fell in love with it at once. I couldn't stop laughing from the second page, and I remember thinking back then: 'wow, this is the best book ever'. Bulgakov had an incredible ability to combine humour with magic, and serious discussion of the meaning of life, and our existence. I wish I could write something like this! 

Are you a big reader?

Yes, when I have time. I read everyday, even if it's for five minutes. I have a busy life: my work, raising my son, writing when I can find time, improving my Dutch language skills. In the past, before the birth of my son, I could spend an entire day reading. It helped me to escape to a better world. 

Who are your favourite authors and why are they your favourite authors.

So many! Well, I already mentioned Bulgakov. I love his writings because he had incredibly unusual stories. The devil visiting the Soviet Union - how cool is that?!

I also love short stories of Chekov. He had a subtle way to laugh about the grotesque occurrences: bureaucracy, corruption, judgemental way of looking at others. 

In poetry I admire Anna Achmatova and her gentle way of writing.

I also like Paulo Coelho, as his books appeal to me on a spiritual level. I am a big fan of Kate Atkinson, and especially 'Life after Life'. I love the Belgian writer Amelie Nothomb, and read her in French. I like also a good crime story, and I don't really have a favorite genre - I just love well-written books. Nikki French, Sophie Hannah and many others help me to relax and enjoy reading.

You are a blogger like myself. Tell us about your blogging history.

Well. I have been a blogger for a long time, but a blogger with stupid history. I first launched one blog and once it became more or less popular, I deleted it. I did it to two other blogs to mine. I suffer from imposter syndrome. Who am I really, writing in English that isn't even my native language? But with age and acquiring maturity I decided to stick to my writing. First of all, I really love writing, and secondly, I do have a story to tell. With my experience of psychoses maybe I can connect with a few isolated hearts, and appeal to them. But I also write about different countries where I lived, and about life in general.  

Now you also like me, are a self published author! Can you tell us why you went down the self publishing route.

My dream is to publish with a traditional big publisher one day. But I decided to publish my story 'Elena: A Love Story for Humankind', because I didn't have the energy to look for an agent. The book was written with such a speed (two months) and flow that I couldn't wait to share it with others, but if a traditional publisher approaches me, I will be the happiest person on earth.  

You are a multilingual author. How many languages do you speak?

I speak four languages. Russian, French, English and Dutch. That's because I lived in four different countries (in two of them twice). I love languages and discovering different cultures. 

Why did you decide to write in English?

I love the English language. It's the language that many people speak around the globe and I like the idea that people from different countries can easily read what I have to say. 

Could you tell us about your first book please and how it came about?

My first book (unpublished) is a memoir. It's a memoir about my psychoses, about Russia and living in the West. It's a work of many years, changing along with my perception of what was happening to me.  

Do you have any writing tips for aspiring authors? What has worked for you in  the past?

I am an aspiring author myself! But the tip I would give any writer is that it's the process that matters, more than the outcome. Writing heals, writing boots creativity and imagination. The sweet moments when one is 'in the flow' is a gift from the universe. It's good, of course, to get a publishing deal at the end, but it's the journey that really matters. For me, writing is relaxation for my brain. I literally feel it unwinding. Therefore, my advice is: enjoy it.

Do you have a strict writing discipline or do you wait for inspiration to strike?

I try to write everyday when I am on holidays, and on weekends when I am working. So, yes, I have a writing discipline, but not that strict.  

What have you learnt about the nuts and bolts of self publishing? Cover Design, Editing, Readership and Marketing.

Well, one sure thing is that you need some budget for marketing! How, otherwise, can you reach your audience? It's very hard to grow organically nowadays (without promotion), because of the saturation of online social networks. Therefore the only way to get your book out where is to have some money to promote it.  However, based on my own experience, I think that being published by a traditional publisher is still the best way for an aspiring author. They have expertise, readership, and design teams. 

Tell us about your work in progress, namely 'The Russian Patient'. Isn't this the title of one of your blogs?

It was, but I renamed my blog into Porcupines Wisdom, as it's my writing that I find important and not where I come from. But there is a book, called The Russian Patient, which is a memoir.  

Without giving too much away 'What can you tell us about your Work in Progress?"

So, I have The Russian Patient (memoir, which is unpublished), Elena: A Love Story for Humankind, that is available on Amazon. I also have an entire first part in the series of two books called 'Outsiders, and am writing a new novel, whose subject I want to keep private for now:) 

When do you hope to publish it and how? Self Publish or Traditional Route?

Traditional route! I love bookstores, and prefer myself to buy books that have been published by a traditional publisher, as it assures the quality of writing. 

Have you sent your work out to agents and publishers in the past?

Yes, I did. I did it with The Russian Patient, and I had an agent who was interested, but the book needed more work! 

 Finally could you tell us how being a citizen with a dual Russian/Ukrainian family lineage, that this war and conflict has impacted you as a writer and perhaps more pertinently as a human being.

I discuss this painful subject in one of my blog posts.

https://porcupineswisdom.org/2021/12/10/growing-up-in-the-soviet-union-a-short-story-about-russia-and-ukraine/



Ekaterina Netchitailova



Wednesday, 26 July 2023

Ar Bigau'r Drain



Dwi ar bigau'r drain ag dwni'm pam. 

Dych chi'n cael y teimlad ble dych i dan fygythiad. Bygythiadau ym mhob man. Bygythiadau dychmygol yn aml iawn. Dyma sut mae pobol propaganda yn gweithio. Yn pwyso eich botymau ofn yn eich isymwybod. Yr amgen, yr arall, yr eraill.

Oes yna air Cymraeg am gaslighting dw’ch? Mae rhai pobol dych chi'n adnabod yn chwarae ar eich ofnau ac yn cael hwyl yn gwneud hynny. Mae yn rhoi pleser iddynt i weld chi yn anghyffyrddus.

Mae hunan addoliad, hunan serch yn perthyn i rai pobol. Y narcissists bondigrybwyll. Sut ydach chi'n gwybod os dych chi'n delio gyda hunan-addolwr? Dydy o ddim gwastad yn glir. Maent yn gallu cuddio tu ôl i gyfaredd, swyn.

Mae'r hunan addolwr eisiau rhywbeth oddi wrthoch chi. Gan amlaf rhywbeth ni allant gymryd meddiant ohono sef eich enaid neu eich urddas, eich haelioni neu eich uniongyrchedd.

Maent yn gweithio arnoch chi fel dŵr yn llifo dros garreg. Jest digon bob tro i greu anniddigrwydd ond y swyn yn aros yn yr atgof. Dych chi'n mynd nôl am fwy a fwy o gamdriniaeth emosiynol ag dych chi jest ddim yn deall pam. 

Mae'r hunan-addolwr wedi sylwi eich bod yn dioddef o hunan barch isel ac maent yn chwarae ar y ffaith yna bob tro dych chi'n cwrdd. Mae ymostyngiad neu 'condescension' yn arf mawr yn ei arfogaeth oherwydd maent yn ymwybodol yn y faith eich bod wedi cael eich cywilyddio gan bobol mewn awdurdod yn y gorffennol. Sut maen nhw yn gwybod? 

Oherwydd maen nhw wedi dioddef yr un fath ond maent wedi delio gyda'r siom mewn ffordd wahanol. Mae nhw wedi troi mewn i'r person wnaeth cywilyddio nhw. Fel cameleon dynol maent yn gallu trawsnewid ei phersonoliaeth a'i ddull o fod yn syth os yw'r sefyllfa yn gofyn am hynny. Y sefyllfa yna ydy'r un ble maent yn ei elwa.  Gan amlaf yn ariannol ond yn gyffredinol yn emosiynol. Mae rhaid iddynt ddod allan o bob cyfarfod tasant nhw yn dod allan o ornest, wedi i'w ennill.

Dim ond yn ddiweddar yn fy oes dwi wedi dod yn ymwybodol o'r fath bobol. Bobol sydd ddim yn stret gyda chi. Bobol gydag agendor. Bobol sydd yn atgyfnerthu'r teimlad ynddoch chi na dim ond yn ymwneud gyda chi i elwa mewn rhyw ffordd.

Mae hwn yn gallu bod yn sefyllfa anodd i chi oherwydd mae bob achos fel hyn yn gwanhau eich ymddiriedolaeth yn y natur ddynol ag mi rydych yn cilio mwy a mwy rhag ymwneud a phobol. 

Dwi a'r bigau'r drain.     

Sunday, 16 July 2023

A Letter to an Invisible Man

 

A Letter to an Invisible Man

 


Wotcher Cock? How invisible do you feel today? Not invisible enough eh?

Toxic Masculinity and the Patriarchy giving you a bad name.

Your twenty years of fame are surely to blame.

To go from a somebody to a nobody in one quick exposure was always your plan.

Thanatos planted by ‘cywilydd Capel’

 

It’s a funny old game innit, celebrity, fame

We’re all blaming the Sun but that newspaper is our collective subconscious

It is the swamp of our minds writ large

By screaming blue murder at it we’re screaming at ourselves

You haven’t read enough Self Help books, go look on the shelves.

 

The loneliness and isolation you must have felt all these years

as a ‘Trophy Welshman’ holding your own among the British Establishment

We would admire your suit and curled lip and unfinished croissant

“Didn’t he do well” “Look you, indeed to goodness he’s one of our own”

The ebullient personality and dark moods.

 

Now in a Hospital bed you think back to all you have lost

But think to what you have gained

The knowledge that heterosexuality, marriage and family is all a game

It is within those prisons that men hide all their shame

It’s out now, so you are free.

Blog Archive

Bottom of the Ottoman

Hitler navigates the A487 from Aberaeron to Aberystwyth

Goodreads

David's books

How To Be Idle
Second Sight
Freud: The Key Ideas
The Yellow World
Intimacy: Trusting Oneself and the Other
Going Mad?: Understanding Mental Illness
Back To Sanity: Healing the Madness of Our Minds
Ham on Rye
Electroboy: A Memoir of Mania
Memories, Dreams, Reflections
Mavericks
Murder in Amsterdam: The Death of Theo van Gogh and the Limits of Tolerance
On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft
I Bought a Mountain
Hovel in the Hills: An Account of the Simple Life
Ring of Bright Water
The Thirty-Nine Steps
A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose
The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment
The Seat of the Soul


David Williams's favorite books »

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