When I was young I could eat pickled onions
When I was young I
could eat pickled onions
I ate a whole jar
Now I would have to
go and have a lie down if I ate just one
They’d give you Milk
of Magnesia in years gone by for a dicky tum.
I’m nostalgic today
for things I used to do without thinking
like bending down or
turning round quickly.
We used to spin like
tops as kids
I remember jumping
off a garage roof
did my brain and
spine know about that one?
They were telling me
off for weeks.
I used to fall off
walls and bang my head
and run in the house
crying.
Humpty Dumpty had
nothing on me.
Now I look like
Humpty Dumpty whose had an extra dose of pudding.
Where do your treble
chins come from
and the tyre around
your waist?
My metabolism has slowed
right down
I think it’s waiting
for a starting gun.
Watching what you eat
is the pain when your old!
Coffee and Chocolate
& Cheese & Fried Food
can lay me low for days.
Sitting up in bed
like an old wallflower
So your acidic bile
stays in a pile in your belly.
I can’t remember the
last time I had strawberry jelly.
You could be a
daredevil as a kid
as an adult the devil
dares you on the daily and its best to just say no!
I know we are all
going to die
but I’d rather go in
bed with a hot water bottle and a cup of cocoa
than in a fast car
smoking a hookah.
When I was young I could eat pickled onions.
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