it is a flock of seagulls, a pack of hounds
it is a punctured football in an alleyway
Oy, oh enlightened one
it has taken me fifty years to get to today
I know that you are mindful and have found the way
but let me be human, grumpy and stew away
unreconstructed caveman, antediluvian male
seeks female, I can promise you stale
I wish I could change just to please you
but therapy costs money and no you wont do
variety is the spice of life not monogamy
I know you wish to have your day (in court)
but enough's enough I'm not going to pay
for the divorce and the kids and the house
It was never love, I just fancied you and needed sex
I don't care whether you've met up with your ex.
I don't care whether you've met up with your ex.
you could nag for Wales with your mouthful of ashes
I don't know why you bothered with those window sashes
yes I know I'm sexist and misogynist
you say that to all the boys
when they don't come up trumps and buy you the toys
Yes love whatever you say
I know that I'm old and ugly, fat and grey
and not a catch that you'd want this time of day.
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