I had a Dream

I had a dream last night or rather this morning. You know, one of those vivid, pre-awakening jobbers that go on for ever but actually last 5 seconds. Well let me tell you what happened in this epic. It was in Wales obviously, and there was to be a large public meeting and Jeremy Corbyn and John McDonnell were there. A large dusty school hall, packed out. I'd booked my ticket in the morning and had got a stamp on my hand like the ones you get in night clubs and festivals. What was I going to do for the rest of the day whilst waiting? Mooch about like the reclusive, lone wolf that I am. I turn the corner and who is walking up the road with a couple of his mates but John Craven off BBCs Countryfile. He is wearing a Benny hat with a Green 1970s Parka with fur lined hood and a white T shirt with SWP on it. I told you it was vivid didn't I! Well I shouted "O John" and raised my fist in comradely salute. The friendly guy that he is came over, leaving his two mates smoking on the other side of the road. "What's up John? I remember you on Newsround in the 1970s. You, Michael Aspel and Tony Hart were our heroes". "19 years on Countryfile and the BBC give me the boot, so that's why I'm here to listen to Jeremy and John tonight". "Fair enough John", I replied. "Don't forget you're in Wales now, there are some duplicitous bastards about and stay out of the pubs. I'll see you later". With that, John Craven, formerly of Newsround and Countryfile walks back over the road to his butties. Even though I'd got my ticket early, I was 1 minute late getting to the school hall which was packed and standing room only. A grunt with glasses on the door said "You can't come in, you're too late". I said "But I've got a stamp" and flashed the back of my hand under his trwyn. He mumbled 'dickhead' and let me pass. I was ushered down to the front and as Jeremy and John walked down to the stage and the podium, both greeted me warmly and Jeremy said 'Thank you, you have been an inspiration'. "I do my best Jezza", I answered, secretly rather chuffed that I had been greeted by the future leader of the free world in such a manner. I looked over and saw John Craven, all muscles rippling, in his SWP T shirt. Standing Ovation and as the State Sponsored red Trabant left the grounds of the school, I shouted over "See you in Ebbw Vale at the next one".  The vehicle eased itself out of the car park and ran over the foot of the parking attendant in peaked cap who looked the spitting image of Owen Smith with a small Hitleresque moustache.