A sense of place

Where we live is important! Why we live there! Wherever you are in the world, ask yourself that simple question. Why am I living here at the moment? Could be for a number of reasons.
"I moved here for work, I was born and raised here,this is where my significant other is from".
Waking up in the morning in Wales, thoughts turn to the mundane, grocery shopping, bill paying, how long am I going to live and is it always going to be this way. I am obsessed with dying. I spend a lot of time thinking about death, my own and the demise of significant others. I think more about dying than I do about living. I don't know whether this is normal. That great word that means nothing. I have nothing to compare with. Probably not a great idea to do a vox pop on the streets of Aberystwyth and ask people. I often wonder that the activities we pursue and the busyness of our lives is a reaction to mortality. We cannot face the thought so we don't stop long enough to think about it. Perhaps as children we thought less of the possibility of dying but we knew that people did it, because we heard every day on the news that it was happening. Rather than a counter telling my narcissistic self how many souls have called passed and visited the blog I should have a counter that tells me how many days I have left to live! Would that make me become more focused and pro-active? Would it make me more determined to achieve my goals? I doubt it. I would just become mesmerised by it and look at it, as I look at the fish at the top of the page. Sleep, eat, facebook, blog, anxiety, travel,  twitter, shit, wank, piss. Just about sums up my life at the moment. I am very weary of doing age appropriate things. Should be settled now with a career and a couple of sprogs (children, if your reading this in America) Statistically I am at the age when many are getting divorced for the first time. Taking Action is a popular mantra of Self Help Books. Well the action I have taken in the past has not exactly reaped the rewards that I had expected so for now, the only action I will be taking will be Sleep, eat, facebook, blog, anxiety, travel,  twitter, shit, wank, piss.